I didn't know snails could cause gonorrhea and chlamydia!
A river snail climbed up and took a bite on my patient's penis and gave him gonorrhea.
According to my patient, he went with a group of guys to gather fresh-water snails at some lake a couple of weeks ago. He sauteed the snails, and they tasted pretty good, he said. He also told me that, since that day, his penis keeps on dribbling with milky discharge.
I checked, and, indeed, it was dribbling.
"It is gonorrhea. I will have to check you for HIV/syphillis as well. Have you had unprotected sex?"
"No, I don't fool around."
"It only comes from sex."
"But my girlfriend has been with only me."
"Well, either you or she slept with someone else that had it."
"Well...there was this girl that I met a month ago...but she was a nice girl! And the symptoms only started after I went to the lake."
"Then, stop having sex with those God Damn snails, Damn it!"
:)))
(True story, but the snails didn't bite him...lol)
Friday, June 24, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
My Dream from Last Night
Jim went to Florida today. Right now, he's probably with his family at SeaWorld. Tomorrow, his ex-boyfriend will join him. I know he thinks I might be jealous.
Naah...I'm not jealous at all. Last night, in my dream, Confucius reassured me that good things will come to me out of Jim's trip. Mind you, I work with a lot of Hispanic people, so the Confucius in my dream was a mixture of Asian and Hispanic.
In my dream, I was climbing up a very high and steep mountainside on uneven stepping stones. I tripped and almost fell down. In my moment of fear, I slipped out, "F.!!!" Instantly, there was an echoic voice from above: "Mee jild, no FOOK...FOOk...FOok...Fook...fook.....(echoing)."
"Dear Confucius, Jim left me behind."
"Tose hu leeve boyfreng beehine jshall weeturn wid a nog op geef."
"But, Dear Confucius, Jim won't have time to think about gifts for me because he'll be with his ex-boyfriend."
"Bayjience, mee sjweet ungney jild; bayjience. No wurrie. Ichs-boyfreng ooglee!"
I, then, took Confucius' words to my heart and hurried down.
"Weemamber, no Fook, mee jild; no fook!"
I woke up...
I am in peace...aaaahhhh.
Naah...I'm not jealous at all. Last night, in my dream, Confucius reassured me that good things will come to me out of Jim's trip. Mind you, I work with a lot of Hispanic people, so the Confucius in my dream was a mixture of Asian and Hispanic.
In my dream, I was climbing up a very high and steep mountainside on uneven stepping stones. I tripped and almost fell down. In my moment of fear, I slipped out, "F.!!!" Instantly, there was an echoic voice from above: "Mee jild, no FOOK...FOOk...FOok...Fook...fook.....(echoing)."
"Dear Confucius, Jim left me behind."
"Tose hu leeve boyfreng beehine jshall weeturn wid a nog op geef."
"But, Dear Confucius, Jim won't have time to think about gifts for me because he'll be with his ex-boyfriend."
"Bayjience, mee sjweet ungney jild; bayjience. No wurrie. Ichs-boyfreng ooglee!"
I, then, took Confucius' words to my heart and hurried down.
"Weemamber, no Fook, mee jild; no fook!"
I woke up...
I am in peace...aaaahhhh.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Fish-Sauce Queen
Whew! Another extremely busy day...over, OVER!!!
Today, I had no break at all, from 8:30am to 6:30pm. I kept running in and out from one exam room to another. By around 2pm, I had to take about a couple of minutes to swallow five or six chicken nuggets because I was getting hypoglycemic. I couldn't even take a pee break. By the end of the day, I was engorged...no, my bladder.
So, we decided to eat out instead. While my brother was going home to pick up my parents, my sisters and I tried to finish our paperwork of the day. We then decided to go to either the Thai restaurant or the Malaysia restaurant that we had gone to before. The food there are pretty decent. So, my sister called home to let my brother know the location. Immediately, my dad said he'd rather eat at home if we were going to have Asian food. What??? He wanted to have steaks!
What is it about steaks that he likes so much? Steaks are nice once in a while but not ALL the time! For most of the times we are out, which is often, he wants steaks...Lone Star, Long Horn, Texas Road House, or at least Chili or Applebee...steaks, steaks, steaks; baked potato, baked potato, baked potato! He does like the food when we took him elsewhere...Thai, Indian, etc. But if we asked, he'd choose steaks. If we don't ask, he's usually not happy.
THEREFORE, we had steaks tonight. I was hoping to have some Asian food, some rice, rice, rice. I want my rice!!! My boyfriend is a rice queen (he's gonna kill me...lol), so, I have to eat rice. Jim is not a meat-and-potato queen!!! Hmmm...this doesn't sound quite right...LOL! I don't just eat rice. I also eat fish sauce. If I eat fish sauce everyday, would that make Jim a fish-sauce queen? NO, NO, NO!!! (a lower case "maybe", maybe?)
I know...I know...I eat a lot of sweet stuff. So, Jim could be a sweet queen. I love my sweet queen, or fish-sauce queen, or rice queen. Whatever Jim chooses to be, I love him very much.
:D
P.S. I'm gonna have to hide. He's gonna kill me...Remember: I love you!!!
Today, I had no break at all, from 8:30am to 6:30pm. I kept running in and out from one exam room to another. By around 2pm, I had to take about a couple of minutes to swallow five or six chicken nuggets because I was getting hypoglycemic. I couldn't even take a pee break. By the end of the day, I was engorged...no, my bladder.
So, we decided to eat out instead. While my brother was going home to pick up my parents, my sisters and I tried to finish our paperwork of the day. We then decided to go to either the Thai restaurant or the Malaysia restaurant that we had gone to before. The food there are pretty decent. So, my sister called home to let my brother know the location. Immediately, my dad said he'd rather eat at home if we were going to have Asian food. What??? He wanted to have steaks!
What is it about steaks that he likes so much? Steaks are nice once in a while but not ALL the time! For most of the times we are out, which is often, he wants steaks...Lone Star, Long Horn, Texas Road House, or at least Chili or Applebee...steaks, steaks, steaks; baked potato, baked potato, baked potato! He does like the food when we took him elsewhere...Thai, Indian, etc. But if we asked, he'd choose steaks. If we don't ask, he's usually not happy.
THEREFORE, we had steaks tonight. I was hoping to have some Asian food, some rice, rice, rice. I want my rice!!! My boyfriend is a rice queen (he's gonna kill me...lol), so, I have to eat rice. Jim is not a meat-and-potato queen!!! Hmmm...this doesn't sound quite right...LOL! I don't just eat rice. I also eat fish sauce. If I eat fish sauce everyday, would that make Jim a fish-sauce queen? NO, NO, NO!!! (a lower case "maybe", maybe?)
I know...I know...I eat a lot of sweet stuff. So, Jim could be a sweet queen. I love my sweet queen, or fish-sauce queen, or rice queen. Whatever Jim chooses to be, I love him very much.
:D
P.S. I'm gonna have to hide. He's gonna kill me...Remember: I love you!!!
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Tzen
I hate, really hate, the stupid japanese beetles. I hate them so much they don't even deserve the capital "j". During WWII, the Japanese invaded my country, and they were BAD! They uprooted our rice fields. As a result, a lot of our people died of hunger and famine. One of those people was my paternal grandfather, who was only in his early forties.
One night, years back, I had a dream about my grandfather, though I had never met him before. I got to know him through pictures and an occasional story told by my dad. In this dream, I saw some people placing my grandfather into a wood-box coffin. Since he was tall, they had to break his neck to fit him into it. When I told my parents about the dream, my dad told me that when his family was running away from the war zone, my grandfather was separated from the rest of the family. Later, my dad found out that he probably died of famine. And, indeed, his neck was broken. Did my grandfather visit me in my dream? I don't know.
Damn those Japanese who killed my grandpa back then! Damn the Japanese beetles that have been munching on my flowers and plants over the past couple of weeks. There are just so many of them! They eat and have sex at the same time. All the rose buds are GONE! I've been so excited waiting for my roses of sharon (hibiscus) to come out, and they are also gone. They also ate almost all of the leaves on my cherry blossoms, persimons, Japanese maples, and many others. How dare them eat even the Japanese maples! I'm disgusted by the sight of them. But, I just can't kill them all. I have so many plants.
Jim thinks I overdo it on the plants. I beg to differ! I want to make my house a home, a center of Zen. Well, I don't know much about other people's Zen. But, I invented my own Zen; I'll call it Tzen (T. + Zen)... :) . In Tzen, plants and flowers play a very important role. They can create Tzen. They can also destroy Tzen. They can lead you to different levels of Tzen.
Here are some examples of the different levels of Tzen:
1. Planting flowers/plants--non-Tzen
2. Planting flowers/plants in the summer--non-Tzen Absolute
3. Enjoying the sights of beautiful flowers and scents of fragrant flowers--Tzen
4. Enjoying the flowers while Jim plant them--Total Tzen
5. Enjoying the flowers while Jim plant them in the nude--Tzen Absolute
6. Enjoying the flowers while Jim plant them in the nude then get me drinks--Tzen Nirvana
LOL!!!
One night, years back, I had a dream about my grandfather, though I had never met him before. I got to know him through pictures and an occasional story told by my dad. In this dream, I saw some people placing my grandfather into a wood-box coffin. Since he was tall, they had to break his neck to fit him into it. When I told my parents about the dream, my dad told me that when his family was running away from the war zone, my grandfather was separated from the rest of the family. Later, my dad found out that he probably died of famine. And, indeed, his neck was broken. Did my grandfather visit me in my dream? I don't know.
Damn those Japanese who killed my grandpa back then! Damn the Japanese beetles that have been munching on my flowers and plants over the past couple of weeks. There are just so many of them! They eat and have sex at the same time. All the rose buds are GONE! I've been so excited waiting for my roses of sharon (hibiscus) to come out, and they are also gone. They also ate almost all of the leaves on my cherry blossoms, persimons, Japanese maples, and many others. How dare them eat even the Japanese maples! I'm disgusted by the sight of them. But, I just can't kill them all. I have so many plants.
Jim thinks I overdo it on the plants. I beg to differ! I want to make my house a home, a center of Zen. Well, I don't know much about other people's Zen. But, I invented my own Zen; I'll call it Tzen (T. + Zen)... :) . In Tzen, plants and flowers play a very important role. They can create Tzen. They can also destroy Tzen. They can lead you to different levels of Tzen.
Here are some examples of the different levels of Tzen:
1. Planting flowers/plants--non-Tzen
2. Planting flowers/plants in the summer--non-Tzen Absolute
3. Enjoying the sights of beautiful flowers and scents of fragrant flowers--Tzen
4. Enjoying the flowers while Jim plant them--Total Tzen
5. Enjoying the flowers while Jim plant them in the nude--Tzen Absolute
6. Enjoying the flowers while Jim plant them in the nude then get me drinks--Tzen Nirvana
LOL!!!
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Sing Me A Lullaby
I'm not sure if I've come down with the flu or it's just my lack of sleep over the past...forever, but I am exhausted. My body aches all over. I've had a bad headache since this morning. Toward the end of the work day, I lost my balance a little and almost fainted. I didn't tell my staff that because I needed to be strong for them. I also sniffled a little. Usually, these are signs of me getting the flu.
I came home, had dinner, and rested. I still have the headache, but the bodyache and sniffle are better. Maybe, it's just my lack of sleep. I'm stupid. I don't sleep much on purpose. I would stay up very late most nights for nothing meaningful. Most of the time, I stayed up just to watch re-runs on TV. Once in a while, I would get so tired that I dozed off early (around 10pm) and find myself waking up in the middle of the night just to, again, watch re-runs.
To think about it, it has to be from my lack of sleep. Last September, I was sick like this during my very short, 2-day vacation with Jim. I made a mistake by not sleeping much during the two nights before the trip. So, during the trip, I got so exhausted and felt nauseous most of the time. I was very disappointed that I spoiled the most romantic ride along the mountainside with Jim. He was extremely nice to me, though.
Right now, I know I should sleep. I need sleep. I need to turn off the TV and laptop. I need to shut my eyes off. But I can't control myself. My body is already asleep. But my eyes are wide awake. I'm addicted to being awake. I'm addicted to the TV. I feel high.
I'm lucky I'm off tomorrow. My sisters and most of the staff are going bowling tomorrow. I won't. I want to see Jim tomorrow. But I am exhausted. I miss him. I'll make it up to him this Saturday.
No, no sex this saturday. I lobbied for two of the things Jim likes--BBQ pork and sauteed baby clams.
I came home, had dinner, and rested. I still have the headache, but the bodyache and sniffle are better. Maybe, it's just my lack of sleep. I'm stupid. I don't sleep much on purpose. I would stay up very late most nights for nothing meaningful. Most of the time, I stayed up just to watch re-runs on TV. Once in a while, I would get so tired that I dozed off early (around 10pm) and find myself waking up in the middle of the night just to, again, watch re-runs.
To think about it, it has to be from my lack of sleep. Last September, I was sick like this during my very short, 2-day vacation with Jim. I made a mistake by not sleeping much during the two nights before the trip. So, during the trip, I got so exhausted and felt nauseous most of the time. I was very disappointed that I spoiled the most romantic ride along the mountainside with Jim. He was extremely nice to me, though.
Right now, I know I should sleep. I need sleep. I need to turn off the TV and laptop. I need to shut my eyes off. But I can't control myself. My body is already asleep. But my eyes are wide awake. I'm addicted to being awake. I'm addicted to the TV. I feel high.
I'm lucky I'm off tomorrow. My sisters and most of the staff are going bowling tomorrow. I won't. I want to see Jim tomorrow. But I am exhausted. I miss him. I'll make it up to him this Saturday.
No, no sex this saturday. I lobbied for two of the things Jim likes--BBQ pork and sauteed baby clams.
Monday, June 13, 2011
An 80 Year Old Hoot
I'm usually not the one who talks trash about other people's religions. Most religions, in my opinion, teach good things. Growing up with my paternal grandmother being a budhist, my mom a catholic, and my dad a pretend catholic, I had been exposed to both religions.
I attended budhist temples with my grandmother, breathed in a whole bunch of incense smog, then ate a whole bunch of sweets. The rest of the food, I didn't eat. They were all vegetarian. They did a lot of chanting, too. I had no clue what that was all about. But, I enjoyed those times. I enjoyed being with my grandmother.
My grandmother did not want us to be baptized. My mom had us baptized anyway. However, my mom didn't take us to church often. Actually, I didn't remember my mom taking us to church. It was only until I was in fifth grade when my grandmother suddenly changed her mind and encouraged me and my siblings to attend classes for First Communion and Confirmation.
So, I became a catholic and have been one since.
When I came to the US, I was very surprised to find people knocking on our door trying to teach us the Bible. They were extremely persistent, annoying at times.
Anyway, today, I saw a patient who is in her early 80s. She's a tiny Vietnamese lady who smokes a lot, drinks often, and also loves to gamble. She would not quit smoking despite her asthmatic symptoms. And she is a budhist. Apparently, there were some Jehovah's Witnesses who had been trying to convert an 80 something year old woman who has been a budhist all her life. She told me that, for over four years, they had come to teach her their beliefs every Wednesday and take her out to eat every Sunday. How they communicated with her...beats me! At the end of the day, she told me, they dropped her...after four long years!
LOL...She laughed and said it was because she refused to stop smoking, never cut down on her drinking, and continued to indulge in gambling!!! She was a hoot!!!...LOL.
I guess we are who we are...why force to change?
I attended budhist temples with my grandmother, breathed in a whole bunch of incense smog, then ate a whole bunch of sweets. The rest of the food, I didn't eat. They were all vegetarian. They did a lot of chanting, too. I had no clue what that was all about. But, I enjoyed those times. I enjoyed being with my grandmother.
My grandmother did not want us to be baptized. My mom had us baptized anyway. However, my mom didn't take us to church often. Actually, I didn't remember my mom taking us to church. It was only until I was in fifth grade when my grandmother suddenly changed her mind and encouraged me and my siblings to attend classes for First Communion and Confirmation.
So, I became a catholic and have been one since.
When I came to the US, I was very surprised to find people knocking on our door trying to teach us the Bible. They were extremely persistent, annoying at times.
Anyway, today, I saw a patient who is in her early 80s. She's a tiny Vietnamese lady who smokes a lot, drinks often, and also loves to gamble. She would not quit smoking despite her asthmatic symptoms. And she is a budhist. Apparently, there were some Jehovah's Witnesses who had been trying to convert an 80 something year old woman who has been a budhist all her life. She told me that, for over four years, they had come to teach her their beliefs every Wednesday and take her out to eat every Sunday. How they communicated with her...beats me! At the end of the day, she told me, they dropped her...after four long years!
LOL...She laughed and said it was because she refused to stop smoking, never cut down on her drinking, and continued to indulge in gambling!!! She was a hoot!!!...LOL.
I guess we are who we are...why force to change?
Sunday, June 12, 2011
I Admire You
I love kids. I see a lot of them at work, and they are so cute. Actually, they are the best part of my work day. But, I surely don't want to have to take care of them at home. There are just so many responsibilities having children. If you have them, you have to take care of them right, no question about it. Jim loves his kids. And he is one of the most devoted dad I've ever met. That is one of the reasons why I love him very much.
Today, Jim had a bad day. He was exhausted from being at a church function all day with the kids. While I'm glad I don't have kids, I know one day in the future I probably will envy those who sweat themselves now for their kids. I'm pretty sure Jim will soon look back and realize that it was time well spent today. Children know when you care for them. They know when you love them. You will be rewarded with their returned love.
Father's Day is around the corner, I just want to say that I admire all the good dads, all the good gay/bi dads who are struggling with finding out who they are/which path they should take yet refuse to neglect their children's feelings and well-beings.
So...Happy Father's Day.
Today, Jim had a bad day. He was exhausted from being at a church function all day with the kids. While I'm glad I don't have kids, I know one day in the future I probably will envy those who sweat themselves now for their kids. I'm pretty sure Jim will soon look back and realize that it was time well spent today. Children know when you care for them. They know when you love them. You will be rewarded with their returned love.
Father's Day is around the corner, I just want to say that I admire all the good dads, all the good gay/bi dads who are struggling with finding out who they are/which path they should take yet refuse to neglect their children's feelings and well-beings.
So...Happy Father's Day.
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